There's Many Lost, But Tell Me Who Has Won
Friday, March 21, 2008
I hate you, Blue.
Maybe hate is too strong a word. I said something about not hating...hmmm. Okay, I dislike you immensely, Blue. For those of you who are unaware of whom I speak, we need to go back to the 70s, to a peaceful time, but also, a time of war.
(Were there enough commas in that last sentence? Here's a couple more just in case , , , )
Anyway, I grew up pretty poor. But every once in awhile, Mom would get me a pack of plain M&Ms. Oh, I love me some M&Ms now. But unlike the Fatty McFatty I am now, I ate these candies in a slow, meticulous way. I would empty the bag on the table and form up all the colors into 'armies'. These armies would meet in the middle to battle...with the loser skipping Valhalla and proceeding directly to my mouth.
There would be all the armies: brown, yellow, orange, green and tan. Tan? What? What? Yes, tan. Tan M&Ms were the Navy SEALs of the brown army. They destroyed anyone that got in their way and for some reason, they always seem to be the winners at the end of the war. Of course, they met the same fate as their opponents, just not as soon.
Anyway, life was great. Until 1995. For some reason, Mars decided to let Americans decide whether to keep tan or introduce some other color. Americans? Really? The same people who let Small Wonder stay on the air for four years. Of course, America dropped the ball and blue won. Goodbye, tan.
I hate you, Blue.
This post brought to you by Patrick.
Maybe hate is too strong a word. I said something about not hating...hmmm. Okay, I dislike you immensely, Blue. For those of you who are unaware of whom I speak, we need to go back to the 70s, to a peaceful time, but also, a time of war.
(Were there enough commas in that last sentence? Here's a couple more just in case , , , )
Anyway, I grew up pretty poor. But every once in awhile, Mom would get me a pack of plain M&Ms. Oh, I love me some M&Ms now. But unlike the Fatty McFatty I am now, I ate these candies in a slow, meticulous way. I would empty the bag on the table and form up all the colors into 'armies'. These armies would meet in the middle to battle...with the loser skipping Valhalla and proceeding directly to my mouth.
There would be all the armies: brown, yellow, orange, green and tan. Tan? What? What? Yes, tan. Tan M&Ms were the Navy SEALs of the brown army. They destroyed anyone that got in their way and for some reason, they always seem to be the winners at the end of the war. Of course, they met the same fate as their opponents, just not as soon.
Anyway, life was great. Until 1995. For some reason, Mars decided to let Americans decide whether to keep tan or introduce some other color. Americans? Really? The same people who let Small Wonder stay on the air for four years. Of course, America dropped the ball and blue won. Goodbye, tan.
I hate you, Blue.
This post brought to you by Patrick.
Labels: guest blogging
5 Comments:
Oh, how I mourned when the tan M&Ms were no more. They tasted better.
commented by 
seven, 2:11 AM, March 21, 2008
seven, 2:11 AM, March 21, 2008
I did the same thing with skittles.
This post is hilarious! It made me laugh out loud. I don't ever remember there being tan M&M's in the packs in Canada - I think that we always had blue. Just one more reason to blame Canada I guess. I hope that one day you and tan will have the chance to be reunited again - possibly in 'Vintage' special addition packs of M&M's.
I totally agree with you. I protested as vigorously a I could at the time against the new color. It just didn't FIT. Wrong, I say, wrong, wrong, wrong.
And we used to split up the M&M's by color, my friends and I. Each person picked two out of: yellow, green, orange and tan, and the the dark browns were split equally as it was felt they were always the largest group. I tended to go for green as a first choice, then others by mood.
And we used to split up the M&M's by color, my friends and I. Each person picked two out of: yellow, green, orange and tan, and the the dark browns were split equally as it was felt they were always the largest group. I tended to go for green as a first choice, then others by mood.
I played Castle with my M&M's. There was a king, prince, noble women, knights, etc. The green ones were the kings, the yellow either queen or princess. As they got eaten, they "died". The dark brown ones were knights, the tan sort of dukes but sometimes they fought and "died" and they always married the orange ones.
Damn, what was I reading as a kid???
Damn, what was I reading as a kid???
I always have a book by my side, and frequently walk and read at the same time. I am addicted to TIVO and watch too much TV and I'm not ashamed of it. I enjoy going to movies, talking about books and tv and movies, going see bands play, shopping with my friends, being alone with my husband, watching my daughter play, going out to dinner, and getting a nice pedicure. I appreciate good food and get excited by unexpected eating opportunities. I sing songs in the car. I must dance if there's music. I get easily drunk on wine. I try not to be critical, but it's difficult. I respect faith, but do not understand intolerance. I love passionate people. I'll always stay for one more drink and take the fork in the road. In my ideal world, radio stations play good music and people still read books.
